Look Into The Mirror

"Behavior is the mirror in which everyone shows his image."

Johann Wolfgang Goethe

 

When you look in the mirror, do you know the person staring back at you?  Is there a mask disguising the face?  Are you able to look into the windows of that soul?  Or, do you quickly blink trying to erase the image reflected back?  

These were all questions I had to answer one day when I finally awakened from the deep sleep I had been in for years.  No longer able to stomach the stench wrenching from my body, I decided to check to see if the appearance matched the foul odor.  What starred back at me was far worse than the decomposing smell coming from the filth I had allowed myself to wallow in.  Who was she?  How did she get here in this house?  

My mom had been dead for more than six years and my drinking was way past recreational use by now.  No longer a connoisseur of expensive, fine wines; I was a bona fide wino, a true alcoholic for sure!  From sun up to sun down, I welcomed every opportunity to have a drink.  And, it no longer matter if the wine was red or white, $40 or $3.  Heck, let's be completely honest, it no longer mattered if it was wine.  As long as it had some percentage of alcohol in it, I wanted it.  Every ounce of my fiber craved, needed the instant effects of this mind-altering substance!      

By the time I had awakened and looked in the mirror, the original occupant of the house in front of me had long been replaced by a dependent immigrant.  It was too late now to pretend I did not know the culprit; I had starred in the eyes a second too long.  I could no longer deny the immigrant her citizenship of the house she had been camping out in for years now.